Maybe it’s falling apart so you can build something better

Change is constant, but we as people don’t like it very much. We settle into the familiar and when things don’t go according to plan, we panic. In 2020, I watched helplessly as my well-laid-out plans fell apart. 

fell apart
Photo: Pexels/Markus Winkler

Before then, I’d been sure about everything. I was sure about my career, my church, my decision to stay in Nigeria. Everything was as I intended it to be. So when things began to unravel, I wasn’t quite sure what to do. I ran from pillar to post grasping at straws and trying to put everything back in its rightful place. It didn’t work.

Then I gave up trying. And in the silence, it occurred to me that everything was falling apart for a reason. I’d been praying for growth and for the chance to live a richer life. I expected my answers to come in a beautiful package that looked exactly as I wanted it to. Instead, they came disguised as chaos. 

READ MORE: How I got arrested for giving someone my number in church

Sometimes to build a new life, you need to tear apart the old one. A high rise cannot rest on the same foundation that carried a bungalow. New wine cannot be poured into old wineskins. My old life fell apart so that I could have the chance to start afresh and build something better.

fell apart
Photo: Unsplash/Fabian Moller

If I’m being honest, I’ll admit that a lot of my old life was based on what other people told me was right. I built to appease the culture and conform to public opinion. Now that all that has disappeared, I can finally build a life that makes me happy and puts my interests at the centre of it all.

So I’m asking you to look at what’s falling apart in your life and see it as a new beginning. Let it unravel so that you can have a blank page and write a new story. And don’t forget to make yourself the star of this new story. You’ve earned it. 


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